One Step At a Time

It could appear that being conscious might be ridiculously easy. We hear about being conscious, understand it, believe we personify it, and then the help we've been asking for in revealing those not-selves, unreal selves, the next step, those fixed points, whatever you want to call them, comes through and leaves us in the middle of a humdinger. The telltale signs are there, the big reaction we didn't see coming but feel immensely, the blame, repeat, blame, repeat cycles that wrench us apart until we sit back down and own the age old reason those points are there - the something we believed that isn't true. If it truly was easy to be conscious, those unreal parts of us would be going, "Heh, I'm over here, shine some more light on me so you can see me better, little more to the left.....that's it". And yet it doesn't really seem to work like that. The journey can sometimes feel more like a battle with something we cannot see. A battle that we feel physically, emotionally and mentally. I have literally been ill with either nausea or muscle aches (unexplained of course) until I am able to work through some of these reactions and triggers and let go how I felt when they got locked in. So, if we accept that being vulnerable is a strength not a weakness, then liquefying the unreal self and accompanying beliefs is what we can use our strength on, it's what strength does. Wholehearted strength liquefies. The heart and passion in strength, in being vulnerable, fuels the change we seek if we can learn to shine more of our light there, to celebrate the joy instead of anticipate or stay entangled in the old learned fear. It really seems to be a journey, one that we take one step at a time. After all, we are worth finding our authentic true selves. Is this what he was talking about when he said, “Things won are done, joy’s soul lies in the doing.”... William Shakespeare.